Our View: You are living in a rape culture. Don’t perpetuate it with rape jokes.
In its short lifetime, the Facebook page OU Memes already has gathered over 4,500 fans and a constant stream of submissions. If you go to OU and use Facebook, there’s a good chance your news feed has been overrun by these OU-specific Internet jokes.
Some are clever and some seem to miss the point entirely. Predictably, some have crossed the line into offensive and started long, angry comment arguments (greeks vs. GDIs, anyone?). But some in particular have gone beyond the realm of “bad but true” or “picking a fight” and tipped right into completely unacceptable.
One particular meme showed a picture of the “Sheltered College Freshman” with the words “First night partying in college atmosphere. Gets roofied. Gangbanged.”
Reader poll
Do you think it’s acceptable to make jokes about rape and sexual assault?
- Yes
- No
152 total votes.
The comments below the picture are a tangled argument between those decrying the joke as indefensible and those championing the poster’s right to a “sense of humor.” And it wasn’t the only rape-related meme sparking similar arguments.
We want you to know this one important truth: It is never OK to make a rape joke.
No, they’re not funny. No, it isn’t “dark humor.” It isn’t clever or edgy or rebellious against the “politically correct” mainstream.
By joking about rape, you’re trivializing the issue, making it something to laugh about. One of the great powers of humor is minimizing fears, making them seem smaller and conquering the monsters by laughing at them.
But rape is one monster we should never work to make smaller. Our society has done just that for far too long. Only by facing the true, horrible reality of rape will we be able to fight it. One of the most important steps to fighting rape is ending what activists call “rape culture.”
Rape culture is a society that ignores, minimizes, laughs at and, by extension, encourages rape. It is a society that blames victims of rape because they flirted, wore the wrong thing, went to the wrong party, slept with too many men or in some other way indicated they “wanted it.” It is a society that protects rapists.
It is a society that tells women they must be careful not to walk alone, not to walk at night, not to drink too much, not to wear that outfit and not to make eye contact with a stranger. To get a roommate, get a dog, take a self-defense class. To always be alert, always be prepared, on guard, watching your back, watching your surroundings.
It is a society that tells women if they don’t follow these rules, they will be raped — like one in six of their fellow women, according to the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network. And it is a society that ignores the one in 33 men who have been raped as well.
Rape culture is a society that accepts rape as an inevitability, that teaches only some types of people get raped, that ignores the prevalence of rape.
Rape culture is our culture. And by making it something worthy of laughing at — by normalizing it, by ridiculing consent and down-playing the objective and innate horror of it — rape jokes allow that culture to continue.
When you, thinking it’s “just a joke,” laugh or simply fail to object, you implicitly indicate you support it.
The fact that you can make a rape joke — and even, in many settings, be relatively certain someone will laugh — is itself the clearest evidence we live in a culture that perpetuates and protects rape.
This is not an issue of us needing to get a sense of humor. We appreciate humor as much as the next person and understand that pushing boundaries and addressing taboos is an important part of that. It’s also not a free-speech issue. You are, and should remain, legally allowed to say anything you want that doesn’t incite violence.
But if this nation is going to fight rape, it has to fight the assumptions, myths and ways of communicating that perpetuate it. The only way to do that is for every person who is against rape to stand up and fight these things where they occur: in our daily, seemingly harmless conversations. Even (especially) on a silly Facebook page.
We’re calling on all our fellow Sooners to stand up against rape, rape culture, rape lies and rape jokes. OU should be a community that gives more than just lip service to the idea that a woman’s body is her own, that consent is necessary and that the responsibility for rape lies solely with the rapist — Sooners should live it with their actions every day.
In the end, rape jokes are a part of a system that protects and enables rapists. And if that doesn’t disgust you, horrify you and make you consider the effect of your actions, maybe you’re not as anti-rape as you thought.
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The10E 3 months, 1 week ago
This is one of the best articles I have ever read in the Daily! I'm glad that the Editorial Board is taking this stance, as it is an issue that is often ignored or minimized within our culture. Anyone who knows someone who has experienced rape, sexual assault, sexual harassment, or sexual abuse--and chances are that you do, even if no one has ever told you about it--should realize that it is never acceptable to make light of such a serious problem.
GeorgeCarlinGhost 3 months, 1 week ago
Relevant (NSFW language only)
http://youtu.be/VcFryjunIjw
It's important to note that if you think rape jokes (in the right context) are not ok, then jokes about religion are not ok (we are living in an anti-religious culture), violent jokes are not ok (we are living in a violent culture), and ethnic jokes are not ok (we are living in a racist culture).
When you start policing people's right to speak (not "free speech", which has limitations as defined by the constitution), you're sliding down a slippery slope. Quite simply, this is a perfectly reasonable and admirable position to take, but you cannot pick and choose certain topics if you think other jokes are ok. If you're willing to submit that NOTHING can be joked about, and we as a society cannot make jokes, I will accept your argument.
Rothulfossil 3 months, 1 week ago
I was actually the one to say, "It's dark humor," and I think it got a little carried away.
Personally, with my comment, I had some NPR interview in mind that I had heard a few months ago with a comedian (an older woman: she's definitely famous, I just can not for the life of me remember her name) who talked about this sort of thing. Her point was that everything is funny. You have to laugh about the horrible things in life as well as the good things. She talked about some routine she was doing where she made a joke about blind people. Someone in the front row shouted, "That's not funny. My mom's blind." She absolutely went off on this guy and he left the show with the applause of the rest of the audience. I wish I could find this interview. It's a really interesting listen.
Anyway, I think people got too upset about it. People who have had experience with rape had the right to be offended, but I think for the most part, it was just a bunch of guys being little white knights. There were so many people in there commenting that the people defending the joke needed to "die in a fire." Please explain to me how that's any better than a rape joke? What if a relative of mine died when our house burned down? The hypocrisy is astounding.
What I've said so far is no where near enough detail to express what I really think, but I'm definitely open to discussion. GeorgeCarlinGhost makes a point that I agree with though. Basically, if you're willing to make jokes about race, religion, politics, violence, or anything like that, you'd better damn be willing to make jokes about rape.
Edit: I found it! It was Joan Rivers. Listen to this: http://www.npr.org/2010/12/31/132490036/comedian-joan-rivers-still-a-piece-of-work
GeorgeCarlinGhost 3 months, 1 week ago
Great comment Rothulfossil.
What really bothers me is The10E's comment.
"Anyone who knows someone who has experienced rape, sexual assault, sexual harassment, or sexual abuse--and chances are that you do, even if no one has ever told you about it--should realize that it is never acceptable to make light of such a serious problem."
Ok so no one else has problems?
Have you ever had rocks thrown at you because your skin is a different color? Have you ever been told you're a terrorist because you have a long beard and your skin is brown? I'm willing to bet you know someone, whether it's a relative, friend of a friend, or a close friend, that's been murdered, mugged, or assaulted.
Of course, it is NOT ok to provoke those people by bringing light of their personal problem. That's just a terrible thing to do and it's bullying. That's also not what a "joke" is.
But by your standards, it not ok to joke. About anything. Say you make a joke about fat people, or how Ron Jeremy is fat. Someone I know has killed themselves because they were made fun of because they are fat. It's sad. But when you say Ron Jeremy is fat, you don't automatically mean "I hate fat people and they are terrible people. It's all his fault he is fat". Likewise, when you joke about rape, you are not automatically saying "it's the woman's fault." Like here - http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2010/8/11/
Same thing with David Hasselhoff. How many of you laughed at his drunken rant on youtube? I know people who are alcoholics that are actually great people, they just have a problem - sometimes serious problems, not unlike the psychological issues rape victims have. By your standard, you would never be able to joke about someone being drunk, because somewhere out there, it offends someone that has a drunk relative.
The "my son is blind!" comment Rothulfossil highlighted is perfect. It's ok to joke about Arabs, terrorists, atheists and things the American public generally hates, but as soon as you start joking about "certain" topics, it's not ok anymore. That's a shame.
Rothulfossil 3 months, 1 week ago
Exactly! After finding that article, I can't believe I even forgot an even better example. Her husband committed suicide, and her first joke after the fact was, "'My husband killed himself and left a message that I have to visit him every day, so I had him cremated and sprinkled him in Neiman Marcus. Haven't missed a day."
That's offensive! And hilarious! She says in the interview, "Comedy is to make people laugh and deal with things." It's an excellent quote that's oh so relevant to this.
I'm a pretty scrawny fellow. All through grade school people joked about how skinny I am. It was offensive for a while. I'm also 100% German, with the blue eyes and blond hair thing going on. People would (and still do!) joke about me being a Nazi. I HATED that for the longest time! Now I realize that it's just so horrible that people NEED to joke about it. I laugh at myself for these things. Am I really a Nazi? Hell no, and I hate everything about what happened during the holocaust. Do we want to sit around and have serious discussion about the Holocaust all the time? No, we don't. Life gets all dreary that way. So how do we keep the memory and awareness alive? We joke. We jest. We poke fun. Saying, "Ohhh you better not joke about that!" just cuts off one form of discussion and communication that works so well.
Things in bad taste are often what starts conversation, which, in the end, is productive. It's just important to focus on the progress forward on the topic rather than dwelling on the "bad taste" incident.
Tank 3 months, 1 week ago
Interesting article about female comedians and taboo-breaking (including rape jokes.)
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/16/arts/television/female-comedians-are-confidently-breaking-taste-taboos.html?pagewanted=all
Here is a taste from Sarah Silverman: “I need more rape jokes,” she shouted nasally before letting her fans in on what she called a comedy secret, that such jokes are actually not so “edgy” after all. “Who’s going to complain about rape jokes? Rape victims?” she asked. “They barely even report rape.” There were no groans this time.
Freshgeek 3 months, 1 week ago
I have to completely disagree with this article. Some of you who have meet me have seen my sense of humor. I've made jokes about the holocaust, dead babies, religious figures, and yes, even rape. At no point is it my intention to minimize the subject or the horror behind it, I just like to laugh. Laughter is an amazing coping mechanism, and no one should be able to take it away from you.
There are times when such humor is not appropriate. I would never make a dead baby joke around a woman who just had a miscarriage. If I did not know she had had one and still made the joke, I would apologize profusely, not because I said it, but because I did not mean to bring up bad memories on a sensitive subject.
The person who posted that meme was in the right as far as I am concerned. Maybe posting it to a place with thousands of strangers who could look at it was not the best idea, but I still think he is okay. I agree with Rothulfossil, that it is a slippery slope to say some things are fair game, when others aren't. To me, either its all okay, or none of it is. If you don't like it, don't look at it.
The only person responsible for a rape is the rapist. Making jokes about a sensitive subject in no way minimizes it.
LWSchurtz 3 months, 1 week ago
It's not about trivialization, it's about endorsement.
There's a joke about a guy riding behind his friend on a motorcycle; the second guy is wearing a jacket with a broken zipper, so he turns his jacket around to keep the wind out. The bike hits a bump, the guy in back falls off, and the guy in front doesn't notice for a bit. When he does, he heads back to where the bump was and sees a crowd of people gathered 'round. He asks, "How's my friend?" One guy replies "He was fine 'til we turned his head back 'round the way it was supposed to go. Hasn't said a word since."
Now the humor here is not that the guy was killed. It's that he was killed accidentally. You can still be horrified that the guy was killed, even if it's sort of funny - in an awful way - that he died the particular way he did. The humor is that no one meant to kill anyone. Everyone was trying to do the right thing. The juxtaposition of the intent and result is the humorous bit. You don't have to endorse murder to find the joke funny.
Rape jokes never work this way. In pretty much all cases I can think of, the "humor" is in the fact that someone - virtually always a woman - is going to be raped and the soon-to-be-rapist in question knows it. The "jokes" on "Family Guy" where Quagmire discovers a female character who is unconscious or otherwise unable to defend herself and says something like "Jackpot" or whatever idiotic phrase he uses? The whole, entire joke there is that (a) some woman is about to get raped and (b) this just made Quagmire's day. That's it. Maybe he does it in an "endearing" way. Whatever. The crux of what we - the viewers - are allegedly finding funny is that this guy is about to rape a girl and he's going to enjoy it.
That's monstrous.
Would it be funny if I said, "Hey! I just killed a dude!" What if I just said, "Hey, gas chambers! Am I right or what?" Neither of those things is funny. Rape jokes - invariably, to my knowledge - include a knowing, willing rapist and his (and it's always a guy) intent to rape AS THE PUNCHLINE. There's no humorous misunderstanding on the part of the rapist. There's no juxtaposition of intent and result so common to much humor. There's just someone waiting to rape someone else, and that's supposed to be funny.
We make ethical judgments about jokes all the time. There are plenty of jokes that might have hurtful results that we judge to be ethically unacceptable, either in specific situations or in general. This is a common situation. Moreover, though, there are jokes that are ethically suspect simply because they portray an ethically questionable behavior as FUNNY IN ITSELF. This is an important distinction. Most if not all rape jokes rely on the hearer finding rape to be funny in itself, and that's crazy. Finding something to be funny in itself is the opposite of finding it to morally weighty. So, yes, laughing at those kinds of jokes is endorsing rape.
stanfieldm 3 months, 1 week ago
This is Mary Stanfield, the Daily opinion editor, and I just wanted to take this chance to respond to the comments so far and clarify some points. (And to thank you all for the well thought out comments so far.)
Some are objecting that if we say no to rape jokes, we'll have to say no to jokes about all kinds of other potentially offensive material, which would destroy a large percentage of comedy. This would indeed be a consequence of our argument if we lived in a society in which an unspoken societal construct served to silence, minimize and, therefore, perpetuate those issues. But since this is not the case for violence or other issues that may be offensive, controversial topics, then our argument does not extend beyond jokes about rape and sexual assault.
Now, that ignores the interesting exception of racial jokes, which are a complicated issue. It comes down to a broad, complex discussion about the nature of race and racial inequality in this country. To take a first, surface stab at tackle the question of racial jokes, I would say that it is contextual. If you are in a situation, community, context, etc. in which it is clear that the joke will not perpetuate hate a violence, then go ahead. But there are contexts -- and it might perhaps be successfully argued that this includes the entire country -- in which a racial joke would do just that.
But rape is not contextual. It is always a violent, terrible crime that is consistently ignored, justified and shrugged off. Maybe there are a few jokes that mention rape as a means of drawing attention to the issue with humor, but let's be honest: We all know those aren't the kinds of jokes we're talking about here. We're talking about jokes in which the punchline is a women being target for sexual violence. Think about it, you might tell a joke about all Asians being bad drivers (which clearly based more in stereotypes than any real racial violence), but would you tell a joke about a black man being lynched? More to the point, would you tell that joke knowing that by doing so you were supporting a culture that allows black men to be murdered?
That is what this comes down to. No one wants to "police" what people say. We want to encourage people to think about the effects of what they say. We want to get Sooners to help each other consider these effects, so that we can start fighting rape culture right here on campus. It's a personal choice, but like any other ethical decision, it is one that members of the community have a right to hold you accountable for.
In the end, the question is simple: Is that rape joke really worth it to you?
Tank 3 months, 1 week ago
Men are the punchline in rape jokes every day. They usually follow the formula of "Once he gets to prison..." and "I hope he has soap on a rope..."
Why do you claim that rape jokes support a culture of rape? Do you have any supporting evidence for your claim? This reminds me of the claims that violent video games have led to an increase in societal violence. Studies have demonstrated a correlation, but not causation. (http://www.grandtheftchildhood.com/GTC/Summary.html)
Kate_K 3 months, 1 week ago
Rape is a terrible thing and a serious problem in our society. I was a victim of sexual abuse as a child, and it definitely has affected my life. That being said, I can't agree with the viewpoint taken in this article.
The idea that rape jokes enable and protect rapists is simply wrong. It isn't the fault of the people who joke about rape that there are a few people crazy enough to actually commit the act. And it isn't legitimizing their action either; everyone knows rape is wrong. If it wasn't, there wouldn't be much to joke about in the first place. It's the same reason that murder, racism, and other problems are often joked about.
If you're against rape jokes because they enable rapists, you need to also be against joking about murder, as it legitimises homicide. You need to be against joking about race, since it legitimises racism. Joking about political corruptness would be protecting corrupt politicians. It's exactly the opposite: joking about these sorts of things is funny precisely because the jokes are extreme. No one claims that jokes about murder make homicide culturally acceptable, even a little bit. I don't think society takes rape seriously enough, but the only people who can fix that are the victims, most of whom never report the crime.
And if anyone finds rape jokes offensive, they don't have to pay attention. Many people find racial jokes offensive, yet for many others they're funny. The internet is full of offensive content of all types, and the stuff that sticks does so because someone finds it amusing. Even if that someone isn't you (and it certainly isn't me), who are we to say what someone should or shouldn't find amusing?
Kate_K 3 months, 1 week ago
@stanfieldm I would argue that racist jokes are not the only parallel that can be drawn, and women are not the only group that is victimized in our society. Anyone who has been to the more conservative parts of this state or other states has likely heard a gay-bashing joke at some point or another. And yet we live in a society where, in many parts of the country, bullying gay people isn't just acceptable, it's the norm. I refer you to http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2096922/9-student-suicides-Michele-Bacmanns-Minnesota-linked-anti-gay-bullying.html to see how extreme the situation really is.
The only person who is at fault for rape is the rapist. We live in a culture where everyone knows that rape is morally and ethically unacceptable. Jokes about it don't change that fact. However, nothing can be done about the problem unless victims are willing to admit that they were raped. In fact, by not reporting the crime, victims are endangering others by potentially leaving rapists on the streets. Until victims are willing to speak up, nothing will change, and the assaults will continue. Insofar as anyone but the rapists can be blamed for our current situation, I find it hard to put the onus more on a few people telling a few jokes than on the victims who, for whatever reason, will not report the crimes and hence keep rapists on the street and foster the idea that rape is unlikely to be punished.
Squeezy89 3 months, 1 week ago
Ya... you know what, everyone shoul walk alone in dangerous ares, walk at night, drink way too much, wear bad outfit choices and do whatever with strangers. Trust everyone. Never get a roommate, a dog, and certainly never learn how to protect yourself. Never be alert, prepared, on guard, watch your back, or your surroundings. Good call. P.S. Way off on this article. A joke is a joke and take it that way.
GeorgeCarlinGhost 3 months, 1 week ago
Fighting people who joke about the matter on social media is the last thing that would actually stop real rape. There are a variety of different ways to stop this horrid act on a campus level.
Encourage victims to come forward. Increase funding in counseling strictly for women and stress the confidentiality of it. Hold seminars for new Freshmen on date rape, and refresher seminars for higher level students. Encourage female professors to have one on ones with students and make sure they're partying responsibly.
Stopping people who make jokes is the least important bullet point on the list. It's almost like Minority Report's "pre-crime" conundrum/fallacy.
Also, Kate brings up a great point. You can't blame the victim. Likewise, you can't blame people who joke about it. Blame the actual rapist, and make sure actual rape doesn't happen. The article makes no mention of real solutions to this issue - just imaginary ones.
drummer425 3 months, 1 week ago
Oh for the love of god, grow up. Who cares, really?
This isn't going to cause someone to go out and get knocked up by a mugger in a dark alley. If this really is the type of thing that gets you riled up, log off the internet, never return, and lock yourself in a closet.
It's the only safe way.
Tank 3 months, 1 week ago
You shouldn't make "lock yourself in a closet" jokes.
ThatGuy 3 months, 1 week ago
Yeah after seeing that meme I couldn't help but say to myself, "Boy howdy, I sure do feel like raping somebody now." Please, that's no worse than an episode of Tosh.0 and I would bet my last dollar that at least ONE person who was involved with this article watches and laughs at that show.
kdbp1213 3 months, 1 week ago
no mater the topic of joke, do you find a comedian offensive? change the channel. nobody forces us to consume; we voluntarily consume. if you dislike it, stop consuming.
i avoid 'family guy,' 'wait, wait, don't tell me,' and 'whadya know.' those shows are sold and presented to our culture as comedies. from the few moments of my consumption of those shows, i've found them to be unfunny so i avoid consumption. everybody has different tastes. 'modern family,' 'car-talk,' '30-rock,' 'archer,' and seinfeld re-runs are funny to me. i consume those shows.
the criminal is the reason for the crime.